Stuff From My Notebook (all scraps)
I know I just updated this thing, but I found some loose-leaf papers with some writing I’ve been doing and wanted to transcribe them before they got lost to the aether (which they invariably do). I think I might be on to something with that last rough draft too.
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It’s a world of injustice filled with august designs/But you’re too blind to see with all your mirrors and gold
These lines were inspired entirely by two phrases I thought were awesome (I do this all the time). “August designs” and “mirrors and gold” just sounded like they needed to come from a song or a poem of some sort. I adopted them.
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It’s no use lying to me babe/Quit trying to tell me goodbye/I know you’re tryin’ to be brave/But there’s such pain behind those eyes
I think this was inspired by a quote…I couldn’t tell you which one it was, who it was from, or what the actual original phrasing was — if someone knows, I’d love to know.
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You Can Blink Again (Your Heart’s Still Beating)
They said it’d never happen/The honeymoon was gone/I’d never see you or hold you in my arms/But what they didn’t know/Was the story wasn’t through/’cause now you’re here and I can breathe again/And you can close your eyes and I can blink again
Chance and I believe that a lot of what was on (+44)’s album was taking the emotions Mark Hoppus and Travis Barker felt whenever Blink-182 split and took what they were feeling towards Tom and rewrote it into a story (or multiple stories, even) about just a guy and feelings of love and loss towards a woman. When we heard that Blink-182 had reunited, we were elated — these words just popped from the pen. I’d love to take it somewhere.
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Closing the Ring
So close the ring and twist the bottle closed/The devil that you know trapped inside white bullets/And isn’t it ironic how the thing you need the most/Prevents the life you chose and locks you in that cycle/So bring on the world ‘till the reaper comes to call/’cause the rattle at my side tells me that I’ll make it/Once that heartbeat is out of control those white ones make fall/And keeps the cold blood flowing/This time I need it/I need the pills to stop my heart exploding/Before I vomit up my hopes and—/And good night and good bye/Just please don’t cry your eyes out/’cause I’m still alive/I’m still alive/I won’t apologize
I’m not going to lie — I take a lot of anti-anxiety and anti-depression medication. Sometimes I feel like I’m a slave to them, that I can’t really operate without ‘em. The other day I was in a completely normal situation and went to take my anti-anxieties when I realized that this would be the fourth or fifth time that morning that I’d needed them. I was (and still am, to a degree) afraid of getting addicted to medication, especially these. That sort of comes through here, I think. I think a lot of kids could relate to this and I really think that they would be glad knowing that someone else has and is going through what they are.
That’s really what I try to do when I write. I want to connect with people at that personal level like my favorite bands do with me. That’s why I won’t give up on this project.
I’m a stubborn, starry-eyed fool.
<3
J
P.S. I found these phrases and immediately wanted to turn them into song titles. We’ll see what they inspire.
•The Gathering Storm
•The Hinge of Fate
•Closing the Ring
•Under a Meridian Sun
•Breaking Dawn
•The World Ends With You
•To Write Love on Her Arms
•La Vita Nuova
•Blood and Gold
Meridian is such a cool word. “Pertaining to midday or noon, of or indicating a period of greatest prosperity, splendor, success, etc.” Knowing me, I’d be sarcastic about it. I’m excited.
3 years ago